Have you come across the book The Four Agreements? The Four Agreements by Ruiz are powerful guidelines we can adopt to live our lives, improve our bonds with others, and enhance our satisfaction and health and fitness.

These are Ruiz's The Four Agreements.

The First Agreement: Always be Impeccable With Your Word.

This means staying away from rumors, lies, empty assurances and other means we create distress with our words. Say only what you mean, and just remember that you can cause damage if you're not conscientious with each word you convey.

This is a remarkable advice. Many people don't know the power of their words and see the problem that can be brought about with saying words recklessly, thoughtlessly or aggressively. The majority of us are cognizant that screaming at someone may be embarrassing to them, but subtle little digs at them, or rumor at their backs, can negatively affect others more than we realize, and in harming them, we hurt ourselves.

The Second Agreement: Don't Take Anything Personally.

This 'agreement' is all about figuring out how other people's conducts are a mirror of them only. When someone gives us remarks about us, it's important to remember that no comments are really objective; all of us carry our biases, 'filters' through which we view the world, and the like. Because of this, we should never take anyone else's view of us or our actions as totally right; once a person says something about us (or anything else), they're really saying a thing about themselves and how they view the world.

This is useful guideline for making us feel finer, but take it with a grain of salt. Even though everybody has their biases and there is no such thing as true objectivity, by never taking whatever thing personally, people can really limit their ability to recognize their own unhealthy patterns and biased thoughts, and work on creating more healthy patterns and clear-sighted thinking.

The Third Agreement: Don't Make Assumptions.

Much stress is created when people assume they have an idea of what other people are thinking without verifying with them. Recognizing that other folks might have separate motivations for their actions, even drastically varying world views, and remembering to really try to understand other individuals and discuss these motivations before jumping to conclusions concerning their behavior, can go a long way toward steering clear of interpersonal conflict.

But nonetheless, taking this recommendation to an extreme may cause people to pay no attention to their intuition about people, or common sense regarding an individual's behavior that's damaging. It can also open people up to manipulation if they train themselves to believe a person's explanation of unhealthy behavior instead of judging the behavior on its own. (Example: not 'assuming' they're being cheated on if their partner is exhibiting erratic behavior and the classic clues of infidelity, but vehemently denies wrongdoing.) This one is a helpful suggestion, but should be tempered by inner wisdom and common sense.

The Fourth Agreement: Always Do Your Best.

With this, Ruiz implies to do the best you can at any given moment, and you'll have no regrets. On certain days, your best isn't as good as other days, and that is all right. So long as you put honest attempt into life, you will have nothing to be ashamed of, and will not 'beat yourself up' over a less-than-stellar performance in retrospect.

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